How to support someone on Father's Day

hello • 31 August 2022

For many, Father's Day is a moment to celebrate the dads and father figures who have made an impact on our lives. But for some, it can be a tough day. Grief, divorce or separation, relationship issues, absence, painful or unresolved feelings are just a few of the things that can make this a difficult day.

This year’s Father’s Day might be a difficult time for even more Australians as physical distancing measures and self-isolation guidelines may make spending time with family difficult, or not possible, for many Australians.

If you know Father's Day is going to bring up tough emotions for yourself, a friend or a loved one, it can help to talk about it and have a self-care plan in place.

This Father’s Day keep an eye out for the signs that could indicate someone is finding it tough or might need some extra support.

What are the signs someone might be having a tough time this Father's Day? Ask yourself,

Do they seem:

Moody?

  • Unable to switch off?

  • Concerned about the future?

  • Concerned they're a burden?

  • Lonely or lacking self-esteem?

  • Concerned they're trapped or in pain?

Are they:

  • Experiencing mood swings?

  • Becoming withdrawn?

  • Changing their online behaviour?

  • Losing interest in what they used to love?

  • Unable to concentrate?

  • Less interested in their appearance and personal hygiene?

  • Behaving recklessly?

Are they experiencing:

  • Relationship issues?

  • Major health issues?

  • Constant stress?

  • Financial difficulty?

  • The loss of someone or something they care about?

If you feel like something's not quite the same with someone you know - trust that gut instinct and take the time to ask them "Are you OK?". By reaching out to anyone you think might be struggling with the day, you can show them they're supported and encourage them to access help if it's needed.

Make time for a meaningful conversation

You don't need to be an expert to reach out to someone and ask R U OK? – just a good friend and a great listener. If you know that someone is likely to struggle on Father's Day, or you have a gut feeling that something is not right, start a conversation and let them know you're there for them.

How to ask R U OK?

Follow our four steps to have a conversation that could change a life but remember if the conversation is too big for you to take on alone, contact a professional through the 'Find Help' page on the R U OK? website.

Step 1: Ask R U OK?

  • Be relaxed, friendly and concerned in your approach.

  • Help them open up by asking questions like "How are you going?" or "What's been happening?"

  • Mention specific things that have made you concerned for them, like "You seem less chatty than usual. How are you going?"

Step 2: Listen without judgement

  • Take what they say seriously and don't interrupt or rush the conversation.

  • Don't judge their experiences or reactions but acknowledge that things seem tough for them.

  • If they need time to think, sit patiently with the silence.

  • Encourage them to explain: "How are you feeling about that?" or "How long have you felt that way?"

  • Show that you've listened by repeating back what you've heard (in your own words) and ask if you have understood them properly.

Step 3: Encourage action

  • Ask: "What have you done in the past to manage similar situations?"

  • Ask: "How would you like me to support you?"

  • Ask: "What's something you can do for yourself right now? Something enjoyable or relaxing?"

  • You could say: "When I was going through a difficult time, I tried this... You might find it useful too."

  • If they've been feeling down for more than two weeks, encourage them to see a health professional. You could say, "It might be useful to link in with someone who can support you. I'm happy to assist you in finding the right person to talk to."

  • Be positive about the role of professionals in getting through tough times.

Step 4: Check in

  • Pop a reminder in your diary to call them in a couple of weeks. If they're struggling, follow up with them sooner.

  • You could say: "I've been thinking of you and wanted to know how you've been going since we last chatted."

  • Ask if they've found a better way to manage the situation. If they haven't done anything, don't judge them. They might just need someone to listen to them for the moment.

  • Stay in touch and be there for them. Genuine care and concern can make a real difference.

Help in a crisis

If you or a loved one need support, Lifeline can provide a listening ear and telephone crisis support 24/7 on 13 11 14.

You can find other support services at www.ruok.org.au/findhelp

Talking to children about traumatic events

by Holly Broadhurst • 14 December 2025
The recent incident in Sydney has left many feeling distressed and overwhelmed, and you may notice the children in your life are struggling too. News articles, footage and discussion can all contribute to complex emotions such as anxiety, sadness, and anger. The Child Mind Institute has developed a helpful and practical guide to support caregivers in talking to children about traumatic events, the guide includes specific recommendations for multiple age ranges. You can find it here. Events involving violence or serious harm can be especially difficult to discuss with children. This guide can help you provide reassurance and support, helping young people feel safe and process their emotions in a healthy way. Key recommendations include: Help children feel safe . Reassurance, comfort, and extra hugs can restore a sense of security after a distressing event. Stay calm . Children look to adults for reassurance, make time to process your feelings and emotions so you can speak and explain calmly. Maintain routines. Regular activities help children feel that life will return to normal. Encourage play and connection. Spending time with others and engaging in familiar activities can be comforting. Share age-appropriate, honest information. Seek informed information from experts (such as the Mind Child Guide and R U OK? resources ), using these to teach children as a trusted adult, and provide space for them to ask questions. Limit media exposure . News coverage can be overwhelming, especially for younger children. Listen and validate. Be patient and listen to what may be confusing or troubling them. Recognise different reactions. Anger, sadness, guilt, or fear are all normal and valid responses. Acknowledge feelings. Avoid dismissing their worries, feeling heard helps children cope. It’s also OK not to have all the right words; what matters most is being present, listening, and understanding. If you or the children in your care are experiencing ongoing distress, consider speaking with a doctor or another trusted healthcare provider. Free, 24/7 counselling services are available, find contact details here . If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call 000. Ask R U OK? Any Day.

2025 with R U OK?

11 December 2025
This year, Australians continued to grow their confidence and capability to ask, 'are you OK?' any day of the year - reminding us how real connection and meaningful conversations can happen in the most ordinary, everyday moments. Across every age and stage of life, people helped normalise these important check-ins by looking out for one another, reducing stigma, and driving genuine change. Thanks to our supporters, awareness continues to expand in schools, workplaces, sporting clubs, and communities in every corner of Australia. Thank you to everyone who started conversations, and to everyone who supported the mission and work of R U OK?. Below is a short video which shares a glimpse of the activity made possible through collaboration. *Voice-over by former-CEO, Katherine Newton.

Connecting generations through conversation and storytelling

10 December 2025
From growing up on farms to a shared interest in history, Australians, young and old, are discovering just how much they have in common, and how storytelling can connect generations in unexpected ways. What’s bringing them together is 'Heart and Soul Story', a social enterprise that fosters intergenerational connections. Through its programs, young people and older generations come together in aged care homes and schools to share stories, build life skills, and prevent loneliness. At a recent session which encouraged everyone to Ask R U OK? Any Day, students visited an aged-care community with R U OK? Conversation Bingo cards, which feature prompts to spark humour, curiosity, and connection.
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