Why is every day the day to ask?

hello • 12 September 2018

R U OK?'s Campaign Director Katherine Newton shares what inspired this year's campaign and how you can be part of it

What inspired this year’s campaign theme?

This year’s campaign is ‘Every day is R U OK?Day’ and it’s a very poignant theme for our tenth R U OK?Day. We know that the majority of Australians are aware of R U OK? and have asked the question at least once in past 12 months, however we also know that there is a still a lack of confidence and comfort in asking the question. It doesn’t have to be a crisis to ask someone you care about, “Are you OK?” As a friend, family member, neighbour or colleague, we are the best placed people to notice signs that someone is behaving out of the norm. We want to encourage people to ask the question when they spot those signs, to trust their gut instinct and feel confident navigating the conversation when someone says “No I’m not OK”. We all go through life’s challenges – relationship breakdowns, grief and loss, physical illness or tough times at work or school. The earlier we help people talk and find appropriate professional help, the greater chance we have of avoiding a crisis. It’s no longer a question for just R U OK?Day, it’s a question for every day of the year.

How do we make the R U OK? message part of our every day life?

Ensuring that we are relevant and accessible all year round is a large part of our mandate. As a public health promotion, we need to be in people’s consciousness any time they observe that someone is struggling with life. We do this by communicating all year round to a variety of audiences – mass population, at-risk communities (such as LGBTQI, FIFO workers, regional and rural communities, etc.), people of all ages, from all walks of life. Suicide knows no boundaries so it is vital that we build community awareness and provide conversation guides and help-seeking pathways every day of the year.

What do you hope individuals, schools, workplaces and communities take from this year’s campaign?

Action. We can all make a difference to someone’s life by being human; by having empathy and compassion. These are key life-skills that we should be learning from an early age. I hope that for those who are considering asking the question but haven’t yet, that they understand they will not make things worse and that everyone deserves to be listened to – however long and difficult that may be. Listening is key. Not listening for the sake of it, but really listening with intent and 100% presence in the moment.

This is the second Conversation Convoy , why is it so important and what’s been your biggest takeaway from this cross-country journey?

 Face-to-face connections and inspiring people to support one another is one of the greatest pillars of our work. Meeting so many people on the road – those who are struggling themselves, those who have lost loved ones to suicide, and those who simply love what R U OK? stands for – is humbling and impactful. Being able to link people to local support services – not only for those in crisis or living with mental illness but also the family and friends of those who are struggling – is vital, and support services can be of great assistance to anyone. The Convo Convoy is important because we are responding to invitations from communities who want to do more to prevent suicide. There is nothing more satisfying than that.

Want to support R U OK?Day? Get started here.

Find conversation tips here.

If you or a loved one need some extra support, find tools and services here.

Nazik, in a yellow t shirt, at an R U OK? event.

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The recent incident in Sydney has left many feeling distressed and overwhelmed, and you may notice the children in your life are struggling too. Below, you’ll find advice from mental health experts on caring for your own wellbeing, and providing meaningful support to others in the days and weeks ahead. Talking to children about traumatic events Children are likely to have seen and heard distressing information about this incident. Ongoing news coverage, images and discussion can intensify feelings of anxiety, sadness and anger. The Child Mind Institute has published a practical guide to help parents and carers talk with children about traumatic events. The guide offers practical age-specific advice and has been developed by experts in child psychology, you can access this guide here . Events involving violence or serious harm can be especially difficult for children to understand or discuss. The guide focuses on helping children feel safe, supported and reassured, and encourages parents, carers or guardians to: Provide comfort and reassurance, including physical affection Remain calm and measured when discussing the event Maintain regular routines to restore a sense of normality Encourage play, connection and time with others Share honest, age-appropriate information from trusted sources Limit children’s exposure to news, especially younger children Listen patiently and validate children’s feelings Recognise that fear, anger, sadness or guilt are all normal reactions Looking after yourself, and supporting others Rachel Clements, R U OK? Advisor, and Director of Psychological Services at Centre for Corporate Health, said strong emotional reactions are normal and healthy for people of all ages following public acts of violence, even among those not directly impacted. “Some reactions that are incredibly normal are concern, shock, horror, disbelief. When that wears off sometimes, people experience stronger feelings, sometimes anger, despair, sadness, anxiety or fear-based behaviour."  Ms Clements advised that connecting with friends, sporting clubs, or workplace networks, and simply asking ‘are you OK?’, can play a key role in supporting people experiencing distress. "This event will disrupt the nervous system. One of the most important things we can do is stay connected, talk to each other and lean into supportive conversations,” Ms Clements said. She suggested starting a genuine conversation by asking questions such as: 'it's been tough watching this information coming to light, how are you feeling about it?’ “Then, all you’ve got to do is listen with empathy, without judgment or interruption, and just allow someone to talk about their experience and how they are feeling. When it is the right time in the conversation, you can then gently guide someone towards supportive actions, like doing some gentle exercise, staying connected with friends and family, or maintaining regular routines.” Ms Clements emphasised the importance of checking in again to ensure people have continued support. If you notice someone’s distress is ongoing for several weeks and begins to affect their work or social life, professional help should be encouraged. If you or the children in your care are experiencing ongoing distress, consider speaking with a doctor or another trusted healthcare provider. Free and professional 24/7counselling services are available, find contact details here . If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, call 000. Ask R U OK? Any Day.
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